Incidents in our lives remind us of stories of our past. I don’t know Roger. I don’t know any of the women accusing him. I just know my truth and stories. Here is one.
Something felt strange on my right leg. A pressure of some sort was hitting the bone on the front of my leg. The sensation broke my attention to the group discussion of implementing the marketing campaign in the five cities by the end of the year. Given my junior position in the company, I was thrilled to have been included in this VIP meeting of the advertising partners and managers. I had joined a mid-sized advertising firm in Boston, Massachusetts after a stint at Grey Advertising as an Assistant Account Manager. It was 1987.
My ankles were crossed with my right-leg in front of the left. It was clear something was rubbing up and down my leg. Quickly, I turned to my right and the grin on the married partner’s face was undeniable. He was deliberately rubbing it with his foot. My big blue eyes widened as large as they could as my mind realized what was happening to my 24 year-old self. If I could describe a sickening, anxious, reality to a young woman who was living in a new city knowing only a few people, I would. I can’t because it’s practically impossible to explain the true terror I felt in those moments.
Yes, I told two people, my boss (a woman) and another senior manager (a man) about the incident and the several other ones which followed. Neither person helped me or reported the incident. The shrug of their shoulders and the shake of their heads were the summary of my pain. Although the firm was mid-sized, there was no HR department. I was on my own. What happened? I was miserable and paranoid and as a result, did not perform well and left. What happened tothe partner of the firm who got away with sexual harrassment? I heard he died many years later of a heart attack and left a family behind.
It still hurts but at least now, I can help by speaking out.
Share your #IWasHarassed story with me and @thewomensdebate on Twitter or me @JocelynGreenky